


A small conversation by the fire

by Clarke_kom_eden



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, F/M, Post 5x05, Season 5 Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-26
Updated: 2018-05-26
Packaged: 2019-05-13 23:45:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14758568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Clarke_kom_eden/pseuds/Clarke_kom_eden
Summary: A small post 5x05 fic. A conversation between Madi and Bellamy reveals things he didn't know.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A small angsty fic, no happy ending (as yet, maybe I'll do more, not sure though). Thankyou!

Bellamy sat alone by the fire, trying to make sense of the day's events, but his brain was too tired for coherent thoughts. He knew his sister would be altered by life in the bunker, but she was almost unrecognisable to him. At least he and Clarke still seemed to be in sync, for now, and he was thankful for that. It still felt almost unreal that she was here, that he could talk to her again, ask her advice and have her support. Even though he’d had Raven and the others, it was so hard to lead alone.  
As he thought about Clarkes life the last 6 years, and what she must have endured, Madi slumped herself down next to him, quietly. He smiled at her.  
'Hey, you did good today, getting them here.’  
'Thanks. I’m sorry I couldn't get the others too.’ She sounded so disappointed in herself, so he looked at her, sincerely.  
'Hey, that's not on you. We’ll get them back, I know it. Have I thanked you yet? For saving us that day we landed? I'm sorry you had to, but I've got to say, it was pretty impressive.’  
‘That's ok. I'm a good shot. I'd like to learn some hand to hand stuff though, do you think maybe Echo could teach me?’ This was Madi's not so subtle way of bringing her up. She had things she wanted to say.  
'Maybe. I think Clarke's taught you pretty well though.’  
'Yeah... Can I ask you something?  
'Sure.’  
'I know you thought Clarke was dead, so, it's not your fault, but, maybe you and Echo, could not, kiss in front of her? It must be hard for her to see that, you know?’  
'Madi, Clarke and I, we’ve been through a lot together, but we were never…’  
'No, I know that. Clarke told me everything about you. But, you weren't there Bellamy. You haven't seen her. She radioed you every day. Not Monty, or Raven, you. She talked to you. I think it's what kept her alive.’ Bellamy wasn’t sure how to respond. He’d had no idea.  
'No, Madi, you kept her alive, and I’m so grateful for that. Having her back...it means everything.’ Madi smiled at him, which quickly became a yawn. ‘Go get some sleep, big day tomorrow.’  
'Ok, goodnight.’ As she left, Bellamy tried to process what she had said. He remembered how it had felt to grieve for Clarke, how deeply it had hurt him. It hadn't occurred to him yet that she had been waiting for him, all this time, to come back to her.


	2. Chapter 2

He didn't sleep at all that night. The thought of parasitic worms didn't help matters, but it wasn't that. He looked to the beautiful woman that lay next to him. This was his life now. His friends had become his family, and he had found someone that he cared for deeply. It had all been figured out. But then...  
He couldn't stand it anymore, he had to move. It was still dark out, but sunrise wasn't far off. He wandered the ruins of polis alone, until he saw her, looking out across the desert. The sight of her was still like a dream. The sun just began to show over the horizon, and it bathed her in light, giving her an ethereal presence. She looked deep in thought, just as he always remembered.  
'Clarke, what are you doing up?’  
'Couldn’t sleep. Same as you, I’m guessing. Where's Echo?’  
'Still asleep. Madi?’ She nodded in response. Clarke offered no more conversation, but Bellamy couldn't shake what Madi had told him the previous night.  
'Madi told me you tried to communicate with us. While we were on the ring.’ Clarke took a sharp breath, worried and unsure of what exactly Madi would have told him.  
'Yeah. I tried. I just, I wanted you all to know, that you did the right thing. I didn't want you to feel bad for leaving me. It was the right choice. I didn't even know if you’d made it up there. I knew you’d probably never hear me, but, I had to try.’ Bellamy shook his head slightly.  
‘There's so many things I haven't even thought about yet. About you, down here, not knowing if we were alive or dead, your mom trapped. I can't imagine how hard that must have been.’ He tried to get Clarke to open up, but she brushed it off again.  
'I was ok. I had Madi.’ Bellamy began to tire of this response.  
'But before that, Clarke. Before you found Madi or the valley. You survived alone. If it were me, I don't think I'd have made it. So how did you do it?’  
'What do you want me to say Bellamy? That it was hard? That I almost didn't make it? What good would that do. We’re all here now.’ It was selfish on his part, he knew it, but he wanted her to tell him that she had talked to him, that she was thinking of him.  
'Our lives here on the ground, before, everything always moved so fast. There was always something, we never had time to…’ He trailed off, unsure himself of what he was trying to say. 'And then suddenly, I’m stuck in space, with nothing but time, and my thoughts.’ He took a second before continuing, ‘I thought of you, Clarke, everyday. Leaving you, it haunted me. I lived everyday for you.’  
Clarke said nothing. There was so much she wanted to tell him, so many versions of conversations that she had played out in her head for 6 years. But none of that mattered now. He had Echo. Despite herself, she felt a single tear roll down her cheek. Bellamy instinctively reached out, cupping her face and wiping the tear away with his thumb. For just a second, she let herself enjoy the sensation of his touch, before remembering herself. She quickly stepped back and out of his reach.  
'Don’t.’ She told him.  
'I’m sorry…’  
'I have to check on Madi.’  
All Bellamy could do was watch as she turned and walked away from him.


End file.
